Friday, September 19, 2008


Watching MSNBC right now, and Tucker Carlson is on, being shrill, squeaking about the Alaska State Trooper Wooten and the firing of Walt Monegan, the Alaskan Commissioner of Public Safety. It went kinda like this:

( at some point i'll figure out how to insert video)

Carlson: My God! This is a guy who threatened to murder his father in law! This is a guy who drank in his State Trooper car! Do we really need a guy like this carrying a gun with a license to shoot people?

Answer? Read on, Searcher:

Clearly Tucker Carlson has never been involved in a redneck divorce. When redneck families are going through tough times like divorce (or marriage) they resort to crazy shit like:

-Shanking your "till death do us part" partner's car tires.

-Getting into a fistfight with your father-in-law in the front yard of your house on a sunny afternoon while the neighbors watch.

-Knocking down aforementioned father-in-law in the front yard of your house on a sunny afternoon while the neighbors watch.

-Q. Your current wife has a warrant out. Yet you are separated. What do you do when she shows up angry and drunk at your new (bachelor) apartment?
-A. Call the police and have her hauled off while the kids watch.

-The father in law showing up at the son-in-laws restaurant (where he is G.M.) and attempting to invade and stomp the aforementioned son in law.

-Son in law has sex with Mother in Law. (Not me)

-Wife has sex with step brother.

-Apartment manager has to call the police and son-in-law while he is at work because father-in-law is at son-in-laws apartment with a UHaul truck and is currently trying to jimmy the door lock with a credit card.

-Brother in law breaks into his married sisters' home with a friend and attempts to murder his sisters' husband.

Growing up in redneck Northeast Arkansas, some of this is funny. All of it either happened to me or a brother in law, sister in law, or friend. All of it is true.

The last sentence is not funny. It really happened. To me and my lovely wife.
Tucker Carlson is a jackass that has his head in the sand.

Clearly he lives somewhere else than a large amount of Americans.

To disrespect Trooper Wooten (and I am no friend of the police, but shout out to you Paul) because of the crazy redneck people that made up his family is ridiculous. His profession as a police officer only gave leverage to Palin and assorted redneck relatives (including Sarah Palin's faultless daddy) and friends (as well as the opportunists, the envious and the jealous) to screw with him.

Believe me.

If this guy ran a restaurant, they would be screaming B.S. about him sleeping with the waitresses. Or stealing money. Or steaks. Or booze. The father-in-law would have been on the phone with the S-I-L's boss relating all kinds of bullshit. Anything the redneck kinfolk overlooked before would become fair game. That is how redneck small town families (dys)function. That is the truth of the situation.

Tucker Carlson is a hack, and it shows how out of touch he is with small town America.

It is time for a Systemic Change in the United States.


UPDATE: I want to rid the world of my current as well as ex-father-in-law, too.

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